Some reviews from my May 2024 Paris trip:
Toutatis - This was the whole reason I wanted to go back to France this year (I would've gone last year but I had to spend my vacation money in England instead), and after rushing to it on opening and waiting through a breakdown to get a chance to ride it, it did not disappoint. That said... I was hoping it would top Kondaa as my #1 coaster, and I feel it fell just a bit short of that admittedly lofty goal. I think for me it peaks just a bit too early (the triple launch is incredible and the dip before the top hat gives some bonkers ejector in both the front and back rows) and the rest of the layout, while still excellent, feels a tiny bit perfunctory as a result. I think the latter half is jam-packed with great elements that each would be the highlights on lesser coasters (I love the outerbank and the corkscrew that goes over the extended queue), but none were able to achieve the same "wow" feeling as I had during the triple launch. I think if the final few hills were a bit more powerful so it'd end on a killer finale then it'd be my #1 coaster, but unlike Kondaa's rapid-fire bunny hops leading into the brakes Toutatis's ending doesn't have the same urgency to it.
Speaking of peaking, Toutatis has sort of the same issue I have with Kondaa in that all the theming is focused around the station and walkway area, with the outer sections left rather barren and thus a lot less interesting from an aesthetic perspective. It's likely down to budget, and it's not as bad here since it's still surrounded by forest while Kondaa is in an empty field, but some extra rockwork to provide a few more head-choppers would've gone a long way.
That said, the theming that
is there is a significant step up from Kondaa, and the main plaza in particular is just a delight to behold. The soundtrack in the station does an excellent job of building you up for the experience (even if it doesn't have the threatening aura Kondaa's soundtrack has), and I'm always game for a coaster with a badass dispatch cue.
You may struggle to appreciate all those details on a busy day though because operations-wise the station is pure
CHAOS. Not only do you have multiple staff members running past you constantly in tight and dimly lit corridors, but the way they handle loose objects just adds a lot of unnecessary stress. I deeply appreciate that the top two parks in the Paris area (Disney and Astérix) both have some of the fastest ops I've seen anywhere, but it's not so appreciated when messy baggage systems lead to everyone scrambling in a mad panic trying to get their affairs in order before the next train shows up. The entire cart system (which they retrofitted to Oziris as well) feels like a temporary solution at best, and I'm guessing it was done because having automatic bins on the ride platform either wasn't efficient enough or was causing too much confusion among guests. But in that case, they should've instead incorporated some sort of separate storage/locker area into the overall queue design, like on F.L.Y. or Velocicoaster. Given how long the ride's been in development, though, maybe this wasn't seen as an issue initially.
My quibbles with the ride aside, Toutatis is still one of my favourite coasters after multiple sessions on it. It's the world-class coaster that an excellent park like Astérix has always been missing, and every ride leaves you hungry to re-ride it five more times. It even got my brother, who is rarely one for extreme coasters, to give it a second shot after his first experience left him a bit shaken to the core. I'll be sure to make it a top priority whenever I return to Paris in the future, and it only leaves me more excited for the future of Intamin's next-generation coasters.
Tonerre 2 Zeus - Technically I got this credit back when it still ran with the CCI trains, but the Gravity Group makeover changed a lot about this ride, and I'd argue it's new enough of an experience to write a review about. I never got to ride the backwards seat before they switched it out for two forward-facing rows, but I'll happily take the trade-off with the added capacity. This tends to have some horrific lines whenever Astérix gets busy, and you do
NOT want to be stuck in that boiler room of a queue on a hot day, trust me. Between the lack of shade and being surrounded by coaster track that heats up the air around it quickly, it might just be one of my least favourite queues for a major coaster. I'm both baffled and disappointed that this wasn't addressed during the makeover, as adding shade would've gone a long way towards improving the overall experience. The queue is also lacking in theming, which makes it one of Astérix's duller queues to stand in as well.
As for the makeover itself, my biggest problem with the original was that the CCI trains
struggled over the last few hills, making the finale a meandering bore. Apparently it wasn't always like that, but especially towards the end of its life it was really sagging. I'm happy to report that the Timberliners cruise through the new layout at a much faster pace, delivering some solid airtime on almost every hill even leading into the final turnaround. The overbanks are also a fun addition, and the lightning tunnel, while loud as hell, adds some kinectic energy to the latter half of the layout. Based on those factors alone, I'd argue this is a significant improvement over its predecessor and really shows what this layout is capable of.
I'd almost go as far as put it in my top 25 if it wasn't for
one significant issue... and that's the Timberliners themselves. I praised their pacing earlier, and my problem isn't with the design of the trains. The seats are comfortable, and the restraint fits across your stomach without causing much trouble. My issue is they shake like
MAD on any track that isn't brand new. The trains are extremely sensitive to any rough patch on the track, and will jostle you around to the point that it even hurts in a few spots. I don't understand how Gravity Group can put these on all of their coasters without ever addressing the jostling issue or at least do their best to mitigate it, because Tonerre 2 Zeus didn't feel any less shaky in 2024 than Twister at Gröna Lund did in 2016. It doesn't entirely kill the ride for me, but it
is a significant drawback to what otherwise could've been a top-of-its-class experience. I did ride it a few more times in different seats to get a better feel for it, and I found the back rows to deliver the best experience in terms of airtime, but they were also the shakiest. Tonerre 2 Zeus is a real mixed-bag of a conversion for me, with a lot of highs, but also a pretty crippling low.
Avengers Assemble: Flight Force - I'd heard a lot of opinions of this do-over of Paris's Rock n' Rollercoaster, both in the positive and the negative, before I finally got to ride it this year. Despite having been to Disneyland Paris three times since the coaster first opened, it was only now that I was able to get the credit, as I was afraid of inversions back in 2005 and in 2021 it was closed for the re-theme. Having done all three versions of this layout now... I think this is the best one? At least I found it a lot more enjoyable than Xpress: Platform 13 at Walibi Holland, which was both rougher and felt meandering when there aren't any special effects to distract you from the layout just going in circles. I might have to get back on Florida's version to be certain, though. It's been a while.
Your enjoyment may depend on how you feel about the Marvel Cinematic Universe as a whole, though. I enjoy the Marvel movies, despite their ups and downs, and so I was entertained by all of the sneaky references you could find in the queue line if you kept your eyes peeled. That said, theme-wise it does feel like corners were cut in a lot of places, and based on early concept art the original pitch seemed a lot more ambitious than this. The exterior is just a big blob of grey that probably looks way better at night than it does during the day (Walt Disney Studios Park closed at 9 P.M. so I didn't get to see it in the dark), and the interior queue mostly consists of corridors, some bland character posters, and the occasional sculpture or screen to keep you distracted. It's not a queue you'd want to get stuck in during a breakdown or a particularly busy day, but when I went the line never exceeded 15 minutes and was often much shorter than that, so I could at least blaze through it fairly quickly.
Because the line was so short, however, we were never held in the pre-show room and it was treated as just part of the normal queue. This was a bit of a shame since I think the star of the show has got to be the Iron Man animatronic, which I think is immaculate and is worth going on the ride at least once for. The pre-show was instead played on a loop as guests moved through the queue, which I guess is better than having it disabled altogether. I did think it was a bit strange how all of Tony Stark's dialogue was in French with no subtitles while almost every other character, Captain Marvel included, spoke in English. I assume they couldn't get Robert Downey Jr. to do the voice (they got Brie Larson to appear as Carol Danvers so I don't think it was them being cheap) and because Disneyland Paris is apparently mandated by the French government to have everything be bilingual (or so I've heard), having Tony speak everything in French was probably the easiest option. Having everything explained twice across two languages did slow the pacing a bit, and the whole bilingual thing is something I feel the Paris resort struggles a lot with (it's either having to stop to explain everything twice or missing out on crucial story information because you don't understand French), but treading that needle is admittedly never going to be easy.
Onto the ride itself. The launch does have some punch to it, but you don't feel much of it once you're past the initial kick and speeding into the gravity building. They apparently added a lot more lighting effects since opening, so the interior didn't feel as empty as it looked from initial POVs, but outside of a few show scenes of Iron Man and Captain Marvel flying about and blasting at Kree missiles, you are cruising through space most of the time. The trains had a bit of a shake to them, mostly during the sea serpent roll, but it was nothing I couldn't handle, and the train rode the track a lot smoother than Xpress as I said earlier. I do wish they replaced the trains with the new-gen trains like they did on Hyperspace Mountain instead of retrofitting the existing ones, as the old-school Vekoma restraints aren't the best for people with broad shoulders like me. I noticed that the onboard audio wasn't the most reliable either, with row 6 in particular having a lot of issues with the music cutting out constantly, but the audio was effective when it was working. My brother also enjoyed the coaster a lot (though he preferred Hyperspace Mountain) and hearing the Avengers theme as the train cruises through the break run and into the off-load platform did have me excited to ride it again. It's a fun ride overall, even if they could've done more in places. Especially towards the end of the day the queue is basically dead, so if you want a quick fix before heading over to Disneyland Parc for the fireworks this is a solid enough diversion, I feel. Not the resort's best attraction, but not the flop some were making it out to be either.
Speed Rockets - I love these little Gerstlauer bobsleds. Most larger parks would never go for them for capacity reasons, but I've never been on one that isn't rick-rollicking fun all the way through. Speed Rockets, while not shockingly intense like Van Helsing's Factory nor has the Wild Mouse-style layouts of Tiki-Waka or Thor's Hammer, is still a blast and worth going to Jardin d'Acclimatation for. It's a bit unassuming from the outside, but it packs a lot into its layout and it's just exciting enough to appeal to all ages without being too much for some or too little for others. A family coaster in the best sense, even if the asking price for individual rides is pretty steep for my liking. You may as well get the all-day wristband if you intend to ride it more than once.
