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Are you self-conscious?

Insecure?

  • 5.. Very yes.

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • 4

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • 3

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • 2

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • 1.. Whole lot of no.

    Votes: 0 0.0%

  • Total voters
    0

tomahawk

Well-Known Member
I am. Granted I am working on it by trying to lose some weight. Its to the point where I feel people don't take me serious, but hopefully that can change. Typically I don't get past the point of being judged until people know me really well, and even then I have trouble with it. I have always been self conscious, even when I was in shape while playing football, but after I hurt my back it went all down hill. I try and hide it with being a jack ass and sarcasm, some people who I have known for years don't even know my deflection mechanisms.
 
I hate absolutely everything about myself; my looks, my voice, my attitude, my short temper, my awful eye-sight, my hair (precisely why I obsessively straighten it and freak out when it fluffs up lol), my weight (I'm not anorexic-skinny, just skinnier than I'd like to be...) and the fact that I'm rubbish at just about anything except art.

It's how I look that irks me the most. I don't like my face, which is why most the time I cover it with my long fringe (or 'bangs' for you Americans, ha). I hate looking through all the photos from CF-Lives because I know there are people who take pictures of me...whenever I see myself in any of those photos I'm always thinking "Urgh, look at how ugly I am". I'm not very photogenic, although sometimes some photos I've taken of myself turn out half okay...these are the ones that I actually feel comfortable enough to share on FaceBook. Everything else? No.

The funny thing is, I didn't used to be very self-conscious at all, but then I entered Secondary school (Edmonton County isn't the nicest school, to be fair, so the following was bound to happen tbh) and I was getting physically and verbally bullied for how I look, and getting all sorts of names thrown at me, even some death threats. I'll admit, I used to hurt myself over and over again because I felt so ugly and pathetic, but luckily my best friends found out and convinced me to stop. The bullying and self harm happened pretty much every day from 2003 to 2008, so surely you can understand what sort of impact this has had on me?

It's also resulted in me not being much of a 'people person'. I'm always judging people before I know them, which is something I wish I could stop...but I can't. It also meant that I did something horrible to someone at the end of 2007, which involved befriending them just so I could lie to them non-stop and mess with their head and heart. I never wanted their friendship or love for one second, I just made them think I did so I could eventually turn against them and leave them feeling used. I was really messed up at the time, but my defense is that I wanted to be the one who's hurting someone else for once. I'm glad that aspect of my behaviour has vanished...

I guess being a 'Metal head' doesn't help with what people think of me, especially since everyone else is a chav in my area, but one thing I'll never change is my lifestyle; I love Metal and Rock music and I love my clothes...that's pretty much all I like about myself.

That turned out a lot longer and more personal than I thought it would, but I like to tell it like it is. Plus I feel better after letting that out! Not so much of an enigma now, am I? :p
 

Will

Active Member
^
Clearly people were just jealous of the hair :p

And you can never be too rich or too skinny - but that's a whole other can of worms right there...
 

nadroJ

Well-Known Member
Self-concious....probably a little bit but not massively.

Vain...massive yes! I'm extremely vain, I can't walk past a reflective surface without checking myself out, it's obsessive. Although I did spend the whole day yesterday without doing my hair or make-up so I guess I can't care that much.

Luckily I quite like myself so never really have any moments of self-loathing.
 

LiveForTheLaunch

Well-Known Member
Vain...massive yes! I'm extremely vain, I can't walk past a reflective surface without checking myself out, it's obsessive. Although I did spend the whole day yesterday without doing my hair or make-up so I guess I can't care that much.

Same ha, I can't even go out into my hall at uni without having to get completely ready, even if it's just to grab food in the cafeteria or to the bathroom. And reflective surfaces <3
 

nadroJ

Well-Known Member
 

ECG

East Coast(er) General
Staff member
Administrator
Hixee said:
No one, unless they're a lying or a douchebag, isn't self-conscious.
I'm not lying, so call me a douchebag. :p
I'm pretty sure that all of you that have met me know that I'm not self-conscious in any way. I used to be when I was younger, but that all went away with age. One of the benefits of being an old fart, I guess. :wink:
 

Thekingin64

Well-Known Member
Hixee said:
I'm not saying for one second that I have a perfect body, but I'm happy with it. Would I change anything? Possibly. Am I going to radically change my lifestyle to do so? <img> off. I know people judge me (we all do it, it's involuntary), but I try not to let it get to me.

This, basically as I have a stomach I can use as a drum if I wanted but do I care? No.

Altough, I don't like singing to anyone but me and quietly to Friends.
 

Error

Well-Known Member
Yup. Very.

As far as I'm viewing my life right now, I can't do much right by me. I'm always afraid people don't like me or find me annoying/bothersome, since I usually am awkward in groups of people (See the 2006/2008/2009 lives). Some people claim I'm fine or actually brighten the group, but almost always I think they tell me that to make me feel better.

My weight is an issue, but I can't do much by it. I can't eat fruits or veggies since I start to choke on them if I try to swallow. I know how and why I do it, and how to fix it, but it's far too expensive for anyone in my family to afford. I exercise and eat less, but my weight still stays around the same level.

I never have seen my artwork as good. I have great ideas in my head of what it will look like, but as soon as I start to do it, it comes out worse and worse until it's nothing like I had visioned it. I know they say you are your own worst critic, but I seriously see nothing that saves my works.

Wow I ranted.
 

Beans

Member
I do feel quite self conscious, especially when it comes to my weight. When I was a teenager, or even right up til I had Leigh I was a skinny size10/ 12 then after him went starght up to 14 then 16 after various operations. Constantly told "Its you age" or you will after "that Operation", which doesn't help I used to be able to eat anything I wanted, now have to resort to will power.
Secondly my age, I tend to mix with people a lot younger and feel sometimes out of place, but my mind will not let me think "old" I do not want to feel or think "old", why should I. When I tell people fo my hobby and CF they think I am mad, sometimes you can tell they are thinking"act your age", your a bit old for all that by the comments they say.
 

furie

SBOPD
Staff member
Administrator
Moderator
I'm not self-concious as such, but that shouldn't be confused with having a lack of confidence (which I don't have).

I'm perfectly happy with who I am. I struggle with weight and a big nose, but one I can do something about (but I'm pretty happy day to day without it), the other I'm stuck with.

I tend to be self-concious enough for the good of others I suppose? I don't wander around the house in my pants when we have guests and when I share a room with somebody (not family) then I try not to expose them to too much flesh-of_furie. I think that's just manners though.

Personality wise, it's a bit too late to change who I am. It's left me relatively successful in life in terms of work, friendships and relationships - so it can't be that dreadful. I know what's wrong with me and just live with it.

Confidence though is something entirely different (I think). I'm quite shy and retiring, but happy with it :)
 

Jer

Well-Known Member
There are certain aspects of my life I'm very self-conscience about.

As far as my appearance goes, I dont really care what people think as long as I think I look good.

Weight I feel like I'm overweight and people can tell, however they constantly try to remind me that I'm still a skinny ****.

As far as my hobby, I know a lot of people can be judgmental and having such an obscure hobby like this I tend to also keep it to myself, or tell them it's a travel thing, I wont tell people directly "I'm a coaster enthusiast"

Personality, I dont give a ****, if you dont like me thats your ****ing problem, i'm not going to change to be everyone's ****ing friend.

There is one aspect of my life however, where I am insane self-conscience and knowing CF I feel safe telling you guys) it's my sex life,(or should I saw lack of) I'm still a virgin, and while I used tov be okay with it, there are people (whom I will not mention) who constantly make it into a joke, and it's become pretty bad, I take it very personally.
 
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