As I stated earlier, I was on a retreat for the last three days. The retreat is called Kairos, or 'God's time' in Latin. One of the main ideas of the retreat is to get us away from the real world, slow down, and allow us to not worry about school, friends, society, etc. During the retreat, we didn't know what time it was, and we weren't allowed to have cell phones or anything that could tell us the time. At first, we were all taken aback by the idea of not knowing the time, yet looking back, it was very relaxing and stress free.
Before the retreat started, I really had no idea what I was in for. The whole event was a big secret at school, but everybody said that if you go to Brother Rice, go on Kairos.
What happened over the last four days was absolutely incredible. We were all broken down and opened up, and finally put back together as one. I had so many misconceptions about a lot of my classmates, and they are now completely obliterated. I've learned that even if I am close to somebody, there are probably things that I still don't know. We're not all perfect, and we all make mistakes - it's a fact of life that not many people realize. Nobody lives a perfect life. Yet the mistakes we have made don't matter. There are still people who love us no matter what we have done in our past.
We all opened ourselves up and let everybody know what was going on inside us. We all cried together and we all comforted eachother. We were all moved in some way, and we had no problem giving somebody a hug or a pat on the back. It was amazing that in less than three days, I went from not being fond of certain people to being full of love for them, and the same of them for me. In less than three days, I gained 33 new brothers, and we share an unbreakable bond.
Everybody found God in some way during Kairos. Even the athiests and agnostics found him in some way. Personally, I found God in the relationships and the bonds that we built over the three days. On Tuesday, I was only willing to hug a few guys that I called my best friends, yet earlier today, I was willing to hug everybody(and I still am). As my relationship with all my brothers grew, I could feel my relationship with God grow as well.
I wouldn't be surprised if somebody tried to make fun of me for feeling how I do on these subjects, but there is a reason if they do. If they are insecure or were abused when they were younger, then I understand why they would call me 'Jesus lover' or 'gay' or anything else they could think of. I'm not going to hold a grudge or think badly of them because they're trying to put me down. There's a reason behind it. I also know that a lot of people probably don't understand just exactly how I feel because they haven't had the opportunity to experience something as powerful as this. All I can say is open up to others. Don't keep things bottled inside and wear a mask to hide the pain. Let it out so others know just what is going on, and they will be there for you. It's amazing what the human spirit can do and how great it is.
"Live the fourth, and the best is yet to come"