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Legoland Windsor

Attractivepacamac

Roller Poster
Hi! I was recently taken to Legoland Windsor, well, it did look like it was going to be a rainy day.

Sadly, the rain held off so I felt a little redundant most of the time but there were some good opportunities for me to shine. Lightweight and waterproof, I'm the perfect theme park companion!

I got some photos and had some taken of me too, it's all very exciting this modern technology :lol: Though there seemed to be a bit of an issue with the camera, but you can still see me in all my glory so it's fine :)

We started indoors (boo to roofs!), but it's as good a place as any to start
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sadly we're not so good in hot and sweaty environments like Laser Raiders. We're good at keeping water in as well as out, so it was sweat city in here. Luckily the queue was only ten minutes. Hurray for overcast school days!

We moved around the park next and had a sneaky look at the new hotel
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It looks very colourful, but very little open, outside areas for people to require any kind of coat. They even have umbrellas on the tables!!! Very unfair.

Even worse, the Sealife centre Atlantis thing had you going around inside dry boats. All that lovely water out side and no way to keep it off people!

Here I am leaving, most disgusted!
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Still, I went back for another go just in case there were any leaky subs or anything, but sadly not. So I got this picture of me pretending to be in a fish tank.
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Dino Safari was up next, but once more, no rain and a complete lack of water. I'm starting to get the feeling by this point that my day is going to be a complete waste!
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Ahhhhhhhhhhh! Squid surfer next though and finally, finally, finally a chance to show what I'm made of (it's a kind of polyurethane). Not a drop of skin was wetted this hour!
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Pirate show up next, and I got right in the front row, hoping for a quick squirt from the actors, but my stupid owner just sat on me, and I was of no use when the squirt came - I felt like an unused condom :(
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What about this though?
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WOW! How useful could I be, and only a two minute queue as well? Did they go on it? Did they buggery :( I could have done so much in the way of deflecting (and if they were lucky, laid a pool of water in their lap). People are so selfish!

I did get free reign and a couple of goes on the rapids though, and brilliant, another opportunity to fulfil my role as a deflector of water. Okay, so, they got their knickers wet from lolling around in a wet patch, but that's hardly my fault is it?
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Allegedly time to spin dry on the Spinning Spider and my owner was most wretchedly poorly, but she didn't take advantage of my also vomit proof nature and held the puke in. I could have nicely collected it in her lap and been used to carry it away for later disposal - people just don't understand the power of a pac-a-mac!
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Go on - vomit!!!

Oh, and..
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..that's just bloody cheating now!

Last ride of the day and last chance to help save somebody from a severe wettening. The Boating School sounded like an excellent opportunity, but alas the boats didn't get wet at all, even this elephant was shooting blanks
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So all in all, a bit of an up and down day. No queues, which was fine as without rain there's little point in having me on for long periods of hanging around. However, really wet rides seemed to be few and far between and overall it wasn't the best day out for me. I thought a bank holiday weekend in England would have served me better.

I managed to get on a couple of coasters too which were good fun (if dry). I'm hoping to get out and about though some more this year and to a few different parks and really show my worth, especially as the summer arrives and I'm really needed!

Thanks for reading, and don't forget, the wetter the better!
 
At first I was all confused and then I understood what was going on. Amazing PTR Attrctivepacamac, 'Tis a shame you didn't get to fulfill your purpose as a deflector of wet weather throughout the day. :p
 
peep said:
At first I was all confused and then I understood what was going on. Amazing PTR Attrctivepacamac, 'Tis a shame you didn't get to fulfill your purpose as a deflector of wet weather throughout the day. :p

caffeine_demon said:
one of the best things I've ever read - so nice to see a TR from a different perspective!

Thanks, it's quite hard because I'm a bit of a technophobic, despite being comprised of of complex molecule bonds. I was sooooo hoping for a massive downpour at about 2:00 p.m. and it looked good as the sky became overcast, but it just wasn't to be.

Mysterious Sue said:
Hahaha. Who's responsible for this epic piece of fiction?

Not sure what you mean Sue? Though you do look like one of those types that wears... goretex, eugh.
 
Attractivepacamac, have you blurred out your face so it looks like Lego?
 
Wow, so it looks like the people I'm with fit in with the rest of the park? That would be quite special - I thought it was just a thinly veiled attempt to hide the identity of the people involved, but that would have been very clever ;)

Erm "."
 
Look up the words "parody" and "humour" and the product "pac a mac" and work on from there?
 
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