You know when you collect football stickers / Pokemon cards; and you end up getting loads of duplicates of the same crappy player and no special shiny ones?
Wiener Prater is the amusement park equivalent of that. The park inexplicably has multiple versions of the same mediocre rides, with nothing shiny or special crammed a top its concrete. I counted:
- 5 ghost trains (!?)
- 3 dodge thems
- 3 spinning coasters
- 3 go kart tracks
- 2 gravitrons
- 2 boosters
- 2 really ugly big wheels
And I wasn't paying much attention, because I was too busy moaning about what a rip-off dump the place is.
If you aren't already aware, each ride at Prater is owned and operated by individual vendors. So there's no nice 'all day wristband' available. You have to pay per ride. Cred prices ranged from 3.50 - 5 Euro depending on how slightly above or below average it was.
With 11 creds on offer (Goon alert: Autobergbahn is a spiteful kiddie cred); you're looking at spending at least 40 Euros just for the pleasure of ticking boxes on Coaster Count (because you won't get any pleasure on the rides themselves).
Expect to lose a whopping 65 Euros if you want to chance it on the interesting-looking flat / dark rides as well. :x
Let's start with the parks newest cred: an indoor Gerstlauer spinning coaster named 'Maskerade'. I already hated it because it's name falls prey to that stupid belief that spelling mistakes make things more 'fun'.
The track colour is gorgeous though.
Anyway. The coaster didn't look open. There were building men still doing work to the exterior of the ride building. But annoying man in the booth insisted it was open and kept harping on that I must ride it. (That's the kind of vibe at Prater, like the ops are desperate for your money.)
So I walked up the bland office like stairs, sat in the ride cart and noticed that THERE WAS STILL BUBBLE WRAP ON THE FLOOR OF THE CART! They hadn't even bothered to remove it!
The coaster is very, very short. The ride building, due to having massive holes in it for the track to roam outside, is completely light. There are no visual effects. But there is a sad looking disco ball at the top. There was music playing, it's in the building, not on board the ride. I got an orchestral version of Guns N Roses, no complaints about that.
Due to being so fresh out the packet, this was possibly the smoothest coaster I've ever ridden. But it literally does nothing, it barely spins and the layout is uninspired.
The most exciting part was getting stuck on the brake run for 15 minutes. The engineer came out in a pair of dungarees, and he seemed to have no idea what he was doing.
You know that Simpson's episode where Homer avoids a meltdown at the power plant by doing 'Eeniee-meenie-miny-mo' on the buttons? I swear the engineer was doing that too. He was just making random stabs and looking lost. I couldn't believe it. In the end they figured out they had to align our cart so it was straight to get it to release back into the station.
To make my mood worse, the ride opposite 'Maskerade' is this:
The photo doesn't really capture it. One of the cruelest exploitations of animals I've seen in an amusement park. All these horses are chained tightly together to form a living, breathing carousel. Disgusting. I really hope the park gets rid of this soon.
Tucked away behind Maskerade is the 65 year old woodie-avec-brakeman 'Hochshaubahn'. I love the 100 year old woodie-avec-brakeman at Tivoli Gardens, so was looking forward to this one. It's awful. It does NOTHING. It's basically a kiddie train ride. It doesn't even feel like a roller coaster.
Moving on. As I endured the Volare, the boomerang, the Reverchon mouse and the SBF kiddie cred; I noticed something...
Prater have colour-coded all their worst roller coasters! All of these awful machines are painted a vile combination of red and yellow; just like those insects that have gross colour schemes according to how venomous they are.
If it's red and yellow at Prater, it will give you a headache!
Anyway. I suppose I should be positive about something for a minute. The best coaster in the park is 'Insider'- an indoor Maurer spinner. It's name makes me think of those cinema cards you can buy at Showcase.
The indoor queue line features a mirror maze AND a laser maze! For approximately 43 seconds, I was actually having fun at Prater!
The coaster is ok too, although I expected more of an exciting layout from a Maurer spinner. This one is very similar to the classic Reverchon mouse, with lots of hairpin turns. It had bangin indoor music though. Makes me wander why they bothered to build that shoddy Mess-karade this year, when the park already has a better version of an indoor spinning coaster with Insider.
Continuing on the positive theme, Prater has one amazing stand-out ghost train. Being a big fan of ghost trains, I was a bit stuck for choice by the 5 that were on offer here. I didn't want to spend even more money riding all of them, so I looked at their facades and decided to go for 'Hotel Psycho'.
It looks impressive from the outside:
It has a 12+ age limit and lots of warning signs everywhere, which can only be a good thing!
The individual carts spin around in pitch black, making it really disorientating. The ride music is proper horror film music - ominous sub-bass and creepy synthesizers interspersed with nerve-jangling loud noises. The animatronics and effects were ridiculous! Witches floating out of chairs, zombies on the ride track getting 'run over' by the ride car, ghouls smashing through the windows... I've ridden many ghost trains but this was the next level. It's the only ride that made the trip to Prater worthwhile! Loved it <3
There's no point in saying much about the other creds at Prater because they were all, to quote nadroJ, **** ****.
So I've summarized them on a chart instead:
Here are some highlights from Praters selection of odd flat / dark rides. Firstly, there was Thing On A Bit Of String:
The seats were just dangling from the ride arm by those tiny wires!
Then there was Creepy Crappy Dark Ride With Falsely Alluring Fab Facade:
Look at the wonderful outside! The inside was nothing like that.
Tarted Up Storm Surge:
If only Thorpe Parks' looked more like this and less like a mouldy rainbow. *sigh*
And 'Extasy' - the flat ride indoors. (I wonder if it releases indoorphins)
In conclusion, I'm glad I didn't make the effort to come to Vienna just for this lousy park. It's only worth bothering with if you happen to be the city already. I wouldn't even class it as an Amusement Park, the place is so disorganised and mish-mashed that it feels more like a Static Fun Fair. Cheap, tacky, over priced.
Oh well. I have returned home with my Coaster Count resting tantalizingly on 299. That almost makes it worthwhile!
Wiener Prater is the amusement park equivalent of that. The park inexplicably has multiple versions of the same mediocre rides, with nothing shiny or special crammed a top its concrete. I counted:
- 5 ghost trains (!?)
- 3 dodge thems
- 3 spinning coasters
- 3 go kart tracks
- 2 gravitrons
- 2 boosters
- 2 really ugly big wheels
And I wasn't paying much attention, because I was too busy moaning about what a rip-off dump the place is.
If you aren't already aware, each ride at Prater is owned and operated by individual vendors. So there's no nice 'all day wristband' available. You have to pay per ride. Cred prices ranged from 3.50 - 5 Euro depending on how slightly above or below average it was.
With 11 creds on offer (Goon alert: Autobergbahn is a spiteful kiddie cred); you're looking at spending at least 40 Euros just for the pleasure of ticking boxes on Coaster Count (because you won't get any pleasure on the rides themselves).
Expect to lose a whopping 65 Euros if you want to chance it on the interesting-looking flat / dark rides as well. :x
Let's start with the parks newest cred: an indoor Gerstlauer spinning coaster named 'Maskerade'. I already hated it because it's name falls prey to that stupid belief that spelling mistakes make things more 'fun'.
The track colour is gorgeous though.
Anyway. The coaster didn't look open. There were building men still doing work to the exterior of the ride building. But annoying man in the booth insisted it was open and kept harping on that I must ride it. (That's the kind of vibe at Prater, like the ops are desperate for your money.)
So I walked up the bland office like stairs, sat in the ride cart and noticed that THERE WAS STILL BUBBLE WRAP ON THE FLOOR OF THE CART! They hadn't even bothered to remove it!
The coaster is very, very short. The ride building, due to having massive holes in it for the track to roam outside, is completely light. There are no visual effects. But there is a sad looking disco ball at the top. There was music playing, it's in the building, not on board the ride. I got an orchestral version of Guns N Roses, no complaints about that.
Due to being so fresh out the packet, this was possibly the smoothest coaster I've ever ridden. But it literally does nothing, it barely spins and the layout is uninspired.
The most exciting part was getting stuck on the brake run for 15 minutes. The engineer came out in a pair of dungarees, and he seemed to have no idea what he was doing.
You know that Simpson's episode where Homer avoids a meltdown at the power plant by doing 'Eeniee-meenie-miny-mo' on the buttons? I swear the engineer was doing that too. He was just making random stabs and looking lost. I couldn't believe it. In the end they figured out they had to align our cart so it was straight to get it to release back into the station.
To make my mood worse, the ride opposite 'Maskerade' is this:
The photo doesn't really capture it. One of the cruelest exploitations of animals I've seen in an amusement park. All these horses are chained tightly together to form a living, breathing carousel. Disgusting. I really hope the park gets rid of this soon.
Tucked away behind Maskerade is the 65 year old woodie-avec-brakeman 'Hochshaubahn'. I love the 100 year old woodie-avec-brakeman at Tivoli Gardens, so was looking forward to this one. It's awful. It does NOTHING. It's basically a kiddie train ride. It doesn't even feel like a roller coaster.
Moving on. As I endured the Volare, the boomerang, the Reverchon mouse and the SBF kiddie cred; I noticed something...
Prater have colour-coded all their worst roller coasters! All of these awful machines are painted a vile combination of red and yellow; just like those insects that have gross colour schemes according to how venomous they are.
If it's red and yellow at Prater, it will give you a headache!
Anyway. I suppose I should be positive about something for a minute. The best coaster in the park is 'Insider'- an indoor Maurer spinner. It's name makes me think of those cinema cards you can buy at Showcase.
The indoor queue line features a mirror maze AND a laser maze! For approximately 43 seconds, I was actually having fun at Prater!
The coaster is ok too, although I expected more of an exciting layout from a Maurer spinner. This one is very similar to the classic Reverchon mouse, with lots of hairpin turns. It had bangin indoor music though. Makes me wander why they bothered to build that shoddy Mess-karade this year, when the park already has a better version of an indoor spinning coaster with Insider.
Continuing on the positive theme, Prater has one amazing stand-out ghost train. Being a big fan of ghost trains, I was a bit stuck for choice by the 5 that were on offer here. I didn't want to spend even more money riding all of them, so I looked at their facades and decided to go for 'Hotel Psycho'.
It looks impressive from the outside:
It has a 12+ age limit and lots of warning signs everywhere, which can only be a good thing!
The individual carts spin around in pitch black, making it really disorientating. The ride music is proper horror film music - ominous sub-bass and creepy synthesizers interspersed with nerve-jangling loud noises. The animatronics and effects were ridiculous! Witches floating out of chairs, zombies on the ride track getting 'run over' by the ride car, ghouls smashing through the windows... I've ridden many ghost trains but this was the next level. It's the only ride that made the trip to Prater worthwhile! Loved it <3
There's no point in saying much about the other creds at Prater because they were all, to quote nadroJ, **** ****.
So I've summarized them on a chart instead:
Here are some highlights from Praters selection of odd flat / dark rides. Firstly, there was Thing On A Bit Of String:
The seats were just dangling from the ride arm by those tiny wires!
Then there was Creepy Crappy Dark Ride With Falsely Alluring Fab Facade:
Look at the wonderful outside! The inside was nothing like that.
Tarted Up Storm Surge:
If only Thorpe Parks' looked more like this and less like a mouldy rainbow. *sigh*
And 'Extasy' - the flat ride indoors. (I wonder if it releases indoorphins)
In conclusion, I'm glad I didn't make the effort to come to Vienna just for this lousy park. It's only worth bothering with if you happen to be the city already. I wouldn't even class it as an Amusement Park, the place is so disorganised and mish-mashed that it feels more like a Static Fun Fair. Cheap, tacky, over priced.
Oh well. I have returned home with my Coaster Count resting tantalizingly on 299. That almost makes it worthwhile!
