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Paultons and the New Forest: Beer & Beech Trees

Graeme

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Day 1: To Lymington
Day 2: Paultons

Day 1: To Lymington

The gloom set over the M25 as I headed around the western side. We dashed in and out of the clouds, alternating clear and dark skies. And then, at Staines, they popped into view… Stealth and Hyperia. White giants on the skyline. There was only one thing to do…

Join the M3 and head towards Southampton.

Once past Southampton, I turned towards Lyndhurst and made a beeline for the Visitor Centre. Here, I checked out the merch and bought an embroidered hoodie with a stag on it. It was good to be back in the New Forest - one of my favourite haunts over the last few years.

Leaving the Visitor Centre, I made my way to Balmer Lawn and sought out a whopping Oak tree. Then, it was onto Lymington. I sat in the rain, eating my lunch, and watched the Isle of Wight Ferry.


It was while waiting for such a ferry, in Portsmouth, 1989, that I first saw a leaflet for Paultons Park. I was fascinated by the pictures of things like Rabbit Ride and Fairytale Forest. Alas, I did not manage to actually visit the park until 2007, when I greatly enjoyed Cobra.

The next day, I would return.

But first, important business. I stopped at a supermarket to get some Dartmoor Jail Ale and Dartmoor Legend, then headed to the camp I was staying at. As I sat in my caravan, drinking the beer, I wondered how I would fare at Paultons the next morning. There was only one way to find out…
 
Day 2: Paultons

The skyline of Paultons came into view - Cobra, Velociraptor, Flight of the Pterosaur, all relatively close together. An appealing line-up to greet us, and perhaps one that not many people would feel intimidated by. Seeing this skyline in real life emphasises that any new ride is unlikely to be enormous, otherwise it would be on a remarkably different scale to the others.

Once through the gates, I stood by the central lawn, with its many Cedars. The park was by no means empty and I’d have to plan my day, or so I thought. I should point out that the Cat-O-Pillar coaster was down for scheduled maintenance, but I rode it when it was known as Stinger. There was so much to choose from, I had to decide on my highest priority. In the end, I opted for the most obvious:

Daddy Pig’s Car Ride.

I got in the car - driver’s seat - and proceeded to tour Peppa Pig World. It had a really nice layout and took us past a lot of the characters. There were enough features to hold my interest, such as the traffic lights and the bit where it takes your photo.

After that, I headed for The Queen’s Flying Coach Ride. This was excellent - not truly a monorail; more like flat, aerial coaster track. Whatever it is technically, it is a great way to show you around the area. You really feel away from it all up there - very relaxing indeed.

After that, I opted for Grampy Rabbit’s Sailing Club. I love a good boat ride, and this didn’t disappoint. The water was sparkling clean, and like the Flying Coach Ride, it just felt like a chilled-out bit of exploration.

The nearby George’s Dinosaur Adventure is one of the best Pony Treks I’ve been on, as it takes you around a Horse Chestnut tree and a volcano. The girl working on the ride asked me if I’d enjoyed it, to which I replied I had indeed! Grandpa Pig’s Little Train, meanwhile, is somewhat on the basic side. I thought the layout was too simple to stimulate the imagination.

Apart from a look in Peppa Pig’s House, that was all I did in Peppa Pig World. This area, which has granted Paultons so much fortune, is very well done. I don’t know when the licence runs out, but I thought they had a lot of good ride hardware that they could eventually repurpose. These rides could actually end up better-themed than they are now, to be honest, but that’s something for the future.

...

It was time to explore the nearby Tornado Springs. First, I headed to Trekking Tractors. We set off and made our way around a real allotment, which I thought was absolute genius. My favourite bit was the greenhouse. You also see the actual gardeners as they work, and go past a row of apple and pear trees.

A short distance away is Farmyard Flyer, the Zierer Force coaster. It was actually a bit smaller than I expected, with a big helix at the start and a couple of direction changes. I thought this was an OK family coaster - perhaps a little bit scary for children, but the scale is very much that of a junior coaster.


I wasn’t planning on riding Storm Chaser until later, but with it being so close, I thought I’d seize the moment. In real terms it’s the biggest coaster in the park, and it shows. One of my group came on it with me and we walked down a surprisingly dark corridor that held a lot of the cattle-pen queue. I don’t know if it was my eyes, but I could hardly see a thing.

I climbed into the front-right seat and the bar came down, clamping my knees together tightly. We went up the steep lift hill and down the first drop. From seeing pictures of the ride, I thought it looked quite a simple layout, but in reality it just seemed to go on and on. I didn’t have a clue where I was, apart from feeling reasonably strong forces in the helix.

I’m afraid to say I didn’t like Storm Chaser at all. The problem is that every time you think you’re going in one direction, it yanks you in another. To me, it was not all that comfortable on the neck. I like to look at the track when I’m on a coaster, but the only way I could get through a ride on Storm Chaser (I had a 2nd go) was to concentrate on the front of my car. I quite enjoy the more focused spinning mice, but I came off feeling that the “proper” spinning coasters, with banked, curving drops, are more effort for a lesser result. I’d love to ride it with the seats in a fixed-forward position, in which case it’d probably be a great little twister, but as a spinning coaster it didn’t do it for me.

...

However, I wasn’t perturbed. There were many new-to-me rides I wanted to try, chief of which was Flight of the Pterosaur, so I headed past the aviaries and entered Lost Kingdom. This area is all high fences and dinosaur trainers - much more Jurassic Park than Arthur Conan Doyle.

I should point out that I’ve loved Chessington’s Vampire ever since I first rode it, and have always been eager for anything that might offer a similar experience. Climbing into the 2nd row, I was immediately impressed with the bucket seats. This was the first coaster of the day I fitted into easily.

We ascended the lift hill and glided down the first drop… The ride was much longer and more thrilling than I expected. The turns and helices were intense, and I really thought my feet were going to crack into the rocks. In fact, that is my only complaint about the ride - it is too easy to accidentally kick the chairs in front of you.

I went straight round again for a front seat ride and, of course, it was even better. A fantastic coaster, easily my favourite of the day so far. The ride captured the feeling of an inverted coaster much more than I expected, but that’s exactly what it is - an inverted coaster without inversions.

...

After my flight, I headed into the queue line for Velociraptor. The raptor animatronics were actually quite menacing, especially as I was the only person around! I had been interested in trying the Vekoma Family Coaster in general. What I found was that the seats were rather cramped - in essence a continuation of their “Roller Skater” junior coasters. However, the actual ride experience is anything but…

I sat near the front and we were fed backwards into the ramp (with quite a whack in the back at the top). It’s a long time since I have ridden a full-size Boomerang, but I was surprised how close to it this family model felt. There was a fair bit of weightlessness, especially at the back of the train (which I tried afterwards).

We rushed through the low turns and I could feel the Vekoma quality with every moment. At the risk of sounding fanciful, you really could imagine you were a velociraptor racing around a paddock. We went up the reversal spike, which was rather unremarkable, then rolled back through the layout.

This reminded me why I’m not overly keen on shuttles, as I just find the backwards bit too disorientating. However, it was a good ride - like the Vekoma next door, much more thrilling than I expected. Although I have not ridden a Kalypso or Horus, I can imagine the full-circuit versions are some of the best family coasters around.

...

Emerging near Dino Chase, it was time to right a wrong. I did not ride this last time, when it was Flying Frog, so I was determined to get the cred now. I found this a nice little junior coaster, with some slight airtime on the direction change, although it does throw you around a bit for a children’s ride.

Now I don’t know whether it was all the beer the night before, or the fact I’d been stuffing my face with rolls, but after a 2nd ride on Velociraptor I felt something that I’d never felt at a theme park before - nausea. I had to sit down to recover and it took a good half hour out of my day.


But I wasn’t going to let it stop me having a few rides on my old favourite, Cobra. I climbed into the front of the car and enjoyed something I hadn’t got on the park’s other sitdown coasters - legroom! There’s a great little ledge you can stick your feet onto, and it makes all the difference.

We ascended the lift hill and went down the steep first drop. Then up into the S-turns, which throw you to the side strongly. This isn’t my cup of tea, but it’s part of a mouse. Then, down into an elaborate helix section, which changes direction superbly.

Into the bunny hops, with some great airtime, especially on the 3rd (and the rise out of it). Cobra is such a well-balanced ride. It is old-fashioned, in a good way, in that the sections and elements feel clearly separate from each other, and are easy to appreciate on their own. It was also refreshing just to have some nice, straight drops.

...

Next, I had to try Edge. I remember when the first Disk’Os made their debut, in 2004, and I rushed to Southend to try one. However, up until this moment I had never been on a Disk’O Coaster. Every park seems to have one, but from videos, I always thought they looked tentative and frustrating in the way they “struggle” to get over the hill in the middle.

I climbed into the saddle and couldn’t get the seatbelt over my legs - I needed the extender! Then, the restraint came up and whacked me in the back. To my surprise, the forces felt just right, and I don’t know what it looked like offride, but it didn’t feel like we were struggling to get over the hill at all. However, the ride is extremely juddery in that section and I wouldn’t be surprised if it leaves the park soon.


Before I left the park myself, I wanted a ride on the Rio Grande Train, so I meandered back through the aviaries to Tornado Springs. The fragrance of the engine fumes filled the air. The driver told us there was only one rule - no eating - but just before we left he told us we weren’t allowed to stand up or lean out either. Three rules!

I couldn’t remember the route for this at all, but was soon reminded it takes you around the north-east section of the park, through a patch of woodland and past some pelicans. Quite a nice little ride, but perhaps it made more sense when the park was less built up.

...

There was one thing I was leaving until last, for good reason - Cyclonator. It would be the most intense ride I’d been on since coming back to this hobby. However, I used to be obsessed with Frisbees and Afterburners, so I had to give it a go. Oddly, though, I had never actually been on a Gyro Swing.

I climbed into my seat and waited for the restraint to come down, through which my head struggled to fit! We started spinning and swinging slowly. As I expected, the spinning on these is really just to offer riders a varied position during the cycle. The airtime against the restraint, when you were facing away from the ground, was somewhat alarming; whereas the weightlessness when facing towards the ground was fantastic.

The big swings were hugely enjoyable, and whilst it was swinging at around 80-90 degrees I thought it was the best ride in the park. Nothing else there has those huge, fluid movements. I am probably in a minority, though, in that I think these are better if they don’t go past vertical. Once swinging more than 90-degrees, the airtime felt quite awkward, with me being thrown into the “pinch point” of the OTSR. I can understand why people love the giant Intamin ones with the lap bars, although I would certainly have to steel my nerves if I rode one of those!

Quite a scary ride, but I was glad I’d been on it. I didn’t think it was too intense at the time, but I must admit I felt worse for wear that night. I had enjoyed a full day at Paultons, and it was time to head back to the camp. Almost everything was walk-on and I would have been able to have many more rides if I wanted, but this wasn’t the day for it.

...

My only outright complaint is that the park doesn’t accept cash. I went to buy something in the dinosaur shop, but they refused my note (it goes without saying I am criticising the policy, not the member of staff). It dissuades me from spending as much as I might. The staff were absolutely fantastic, in fact, with a natural level of friendliness that’s ideal.

Cobra is still the best ride, in my opinion, with Flight of the Pterosaur an excellent addition. I normally like to do blow-by-blow reviews of coasters but, quite honestly, I just couldn’t take them in well enough. Most of them feel very similar - all twists and turns rather than big drops. It’s not an original thought, but I believe a small woodie or something with multiple launches would provide a lot of variety.

Paultons is that rare thing - a perfectly-run theme park. Everything simply works. Free parking, loads of rides and no Fast Pass… there is a basic respect shown to the customer. It feels like Paultons wants you there, and for once you do actually feel like a guest. The park is classy, and you can’t teach that.

I left Paultons with a lot more experience under my belt. I don’t know when I will return, but I always find myself wanting to explore more of the New Forest. One thing is for sure - if it carries on like this, the park will go from strength to strength.
 
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