Menu
What's new
By:
Filters

In a perfect world...

Ian

Ian

From CoasterForce
Staff member
Administrator
Moderator
Social Media Team
After reading Joey's rant about this...
2e2e0ax.jpg

...it made me think about theme park perfection.

In a perfect theme park world, all of the track would have been painted, rides would operate efficiently and to capacity all day and queue times would be less than 10mins.

What would make a theme park visit perfect for you?
 
Rides would never break down.
Queue times would be just right, as in long enough for the excitement and anticipation to build but not so long that you get bored and fed up.
People would actually take notice of the "no smoking" signs in queuelines.

I'm sure i'll think of some more....
 
Parks would actually abide by the rules they create. Ie, actually eject people from the park if they are caught queue jumping.

Also, in an ideal world every theme park would sell pin badges as a staple part of their tat.
 
Parks would run their rides according to their real attendance. That means that it wouldn't take for queue to get utterly long before adding more trains. Also, crews would work their buts off to make sure that there was minimal stacking (this is a pet-peeve of mine!).
 
nadroJ said:
Also, in an ideal world every theme park would sell pin badges as a staple part of their tat.
Click to expand...

Yes, all parks would have a wide variety of pens and fridge magnets :)


Also,

- All parks would offer ERT for those that are willing to pay for it (Trying to get ERT for the US, so far I have manged to get Ceder Point)

- Parking would be closer to the main gates and not cost £17 (I'm looking at you Alton)

- Food would be better priced and be of better quality (Paultons have achieved this best so far)

- Staff would be a little more interested and less grumpy (Oakwood has achieved this the best so far)

- Stop making two adults go down together on those Depth Charge type slides, it's not comfortable, and here's a secret from the Norfolk Live, because they made us go down together at PWH, Tash actually broke her belt (or my fat ass broke it to be fair :) ) so lucky it was near the end of the day as there could have been some extreme exposure going on! (other offenders include, Adventure Island, Lego land)
 
Food in parks would be half decent, with a half decent price tag.

It's unbelieveable how many parks offer dog food, and charge £10 for the pleasure. Not only that, there's not normally enough seating, tables are never cleared and bins are never emptied.
 
Stop making two adults go down together on those Depth Charge type slides, it's not comfortable, and here's a secret from the Norfolk Live, because they made us go down together at PWH, Tash actually broke her belt
Click to expand...

I agree and disagree with that. It is annoying, especially if you're in a 3 or whatever, but also, the slide at PWH is insane if you go down with two adults!
 
Martyn B said:
I agree and disagree with that. It is annoying, especially if you're in a 3 or whatever, but also, the slide at PWH is insane if you go down with two adults!
Click to expand...

True, it's belt-braking insane ;)

I'm lucky it was only a cheap belt otherwise she would have been moaning about it all day, and this is not fun haha.
 
The only thing stopping adults going on a kiddie coaster, would be if they were too big to fit, The number of people who will want to ride a kiddie ride is so small, and they'd usually only do it once!
 
Pft, if I had a park it would be perfect. Jordan would be my PR lady and Tim would be in lead creative.

We'd go bankrupt within a few weeks but it'd be perfect until then.
 
No smoking
No chavs
Few people at all really
Better fast past systems
Queue jumpers ejected
Nice food
Wider selection of drinks
Happy ride ops
Better park music
 
No planning procedure or building height restrictions. Just get a plot of land and build what you like.
 
^ That exists. It's called Cedar Point. And it's crap.

Crap is harsh... What I mean is that all their coasters, bar by no coincidence the small compact ones, are crap.

I'm still exaggerating... TTD is fun.

But in serious, no Phil! A perfect park would simply be one with the funding to do amazing things within any restriction. If the world was full of parks who, despite not being able to build above the tree line, could constantly spend 10s of millions on digging holes, then all would be well.

I dread to even imagine what Nemesis would cost today, given that Swarm was what, £30m?
 
But Magic Mountain and Great Adventure also fly in the face of that with no limits and some great coasters. Even Canada's Wonderland does a great job of good rides and very few limitation.

Boulder Dash (getting over your poor experience :p ) is also a type ride that could have been built at Alton if there weren't any limits in the valley. Don't confuse "no planning or height restrictions" with "no restrictions or constraints at all" :)
 
I wouldn't be surprised if we eventually see a valley coaster at Thorpe, just not on the scale we hope nor will it be wood. But that's less about restrictions and more abut money and Britons. :p

Edit: Alton, not Thorpe. Wow what a typo.
 
Coasters would be perfectly smooth, they would never break down, the lines would always be short, and you'd never loose your phone, hat, shades, etc.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top