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What are your thoughts on social media and its impact on society?

Matt N

CF Legend
Hi guys. Social media is ever-present in our lives today; even if you haven't got an account, its impact has been wide-ranging and hard to escape. It's been very controversial, and I'd be interested to know; what are your thoughts on social media and its impact on society? Where do you stand on it? Do you feel it's had a positive impact or a negative one, or somewhere in between?

Apologies if this seems like a slightly random thread, but I made it because I've been having some thoughts about social media lately. And I was wondering; am I the only one who's started to grow increasingly cynical towards social media as of late? Is it just me getting older, or has something changed in the social media landscape in recent years?

Even just a few years ago, I would have been a staunch defender of social media against some of the more cynical types in discussions like these. I've never really been an overly prolific social media user, and there are a number of social media sites I have never dipped my toes into, but I have a Facebook account, and I got somewhat into it for a period. I saw many benefits of social media and few drawbacks. I felt that having these sites that allowed you to connect with family and friends and like-minded people were brilliant, and that social media did so many brilliant things.

But lately... I don't know. I feel like the mask has slipped from social media for me recently, and despite only being 21, I'm finding myself feeling increasingly out of touch with the modern social media landscape and not really understanding it.

I once used to enjoy looking through my News Feed on Facebook, but it's started to become increasingly irrelevant and dull for me. If I scroll through my News Feed now, I have very few posts from friends or pages I follow these days, and most of it is random meme pages and AI-generated stuff related to things I've either never looked at or might have vaguely showed interest in once. I have an account on Twitter/X, but have never posted, and while I admittedly find it useful for updates on fast-developing situations on occasion, I just find that it's so... hateful whenever I look at it in any depth. Most places on Twitter seem to just be laced with hate and anger, and it just seems like a horribly angry and unforgiving space to engage in. And if I'm being completely honest, I've never understood some of the other newer ones or felt any desire to engage in them. I don't really understand TikTok, or the current craze for short form content more generally, at all if I'm honest. It just looks like short videos of people dancing to jaunty music, and personally, I don't really understand it. It's the same with the likes of Snapchat and Instagram as well.

On the contrary, I am admittedly partial to a good bit of YouTube. I have a definite list of YouTubers I enjoy watching, and I do generally find it enjoyable. While I don't have an account, I'll also admit to finding Reddit quite an entertaining and informative read on certain topics. An occasional browse through Reddit is a bit of a guilty pleasure of mine. But even with these two, which aren't quite as much along the lines of "conventional" social media networks and are somewhat less "personality"-based, I'm finding myself increasingly noticing the pitfalls and annoyances. I watch YouTube less than I used to, and with Reddit, I sometimes find that elements of that lack of forgiveness and anger from the likes of Twitter can creep into it.

Going away from specific sites, there also are a couple of observations I've begun to notice about social media in general, and the influence of it more widely upon the world, as of late.

Firstly, I've begun to realise that I think social media has made the world more binary and unforgiving. In years gone by, I feel like you were more able to have a constructive, balanced debate, see nuance and calmly critique the opinions of others without things getting too heated, even on relatively controversial topics. On sites like this one, I think you can still do that to a degree, which is one of the main things that keeps me coming back here! But I feel like people today are more immersed in their own echo chamber and less able to deal with people who don't agree with them, and because of this, people have become afraid of others who disagree with them even slightly and treat them like an enemy. So many areas of discourse have become so binary and angry lately, and it feels increasingly like you're forced to "take a side" and dogmatically agree with everything that "side" believes. In political debate, for example, you're either a "woke lefty progressive" or a "far right fascist" with no in between. In debates around gender identity, you're either a "gender critical TERF" or a "trans rights activist" with no in between. There are so many other areas where this has happened that I could reference. I feel like this two-sided nature and blind dogmatic support of "your side" has stifled constructive and balanced debate around topics, and I almost entirely blame this on social media. I think the likes of Twitter and Facebook, and the algorithms that feed you only what you want to hear rather than what you need to hear, have a lot to answer for in this regard. On a somewhat related note, I've also come to blame this social media driven black-and-white echo chamber on other things, such as the rampant spread of misinformation and conspiracy theories and lack of fact-checking.

I've also grown to realise that there's a certain level of... fakeness, for lack of a better term, about certain social networks. For a brief period in my mid to late teens, I tried partaking in the more "performative" side of Facebook to a small extent, as I felt like I had to to win kudos with people. I had my misgivings about this at the time, and after a period, I realised that it just wasn't the real me. I didn't feel comfortable doing it, I didn't know who it was benefitting, and it all felt very fake. Now I'm less focused on chasing likes (and honestly never post at all and don't even read as regularly as I used to), I feel happier and like my interactions with people are more "genuine", for lack of a better term, and reflective of the person I really am. Increasingly, it seems like some of the posts from friends I do see on my Facebook feed seem similarly fake, and some people post things along the lines of "Let's see who my real friends are. Comment below if you're my real friend" (I have never posted anything like this). With posts like these, I think to myself "Wouldn't you know who your real friends are without needing them to comment it to you on Facebook?".

I don't deny that social media is brilliant in many ways, and has done some brilliant things. But I feel like I'm starting to see downsides to it a lot more nowadays... does anyone else feel similarly? Or is it just me getting older and more out of touch?
 
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You've hit all the major notes on why discourse on Twitter / X is terrible.

A subtle(r) variation of what you've alluded to is what I'd describe as growing 'victimhood / animosity' under the veil of 'counter-culture / freedom of expression’: as per comments such as "I'm cringe and it's great", "I totally don't care what people think... ever!".

Successfully engaging with society requires you to have some regard or care to what others think. It's also normal and OK to be disappointed or upset by the opinions of others. I get disappointed when people don't like the things I like (or me). Being upset is part of life. We ought to allow ourselves to be upset, deal with those situations and then move on.

Personally, I think this sort of 'cacooning' enables intolerance and (wrongly) defers ownership of how one is perceived onto others. As an extreme example of this mentality, I recently saw somebody (who would probably proudly describe themselves as a 'free spirit') wearing a t-shirt that said, bluntly, "**** off" on it.

Forums are king, but overly engaging with them can have downsides; brevity is the 'final boss' of competence and as tempting as it is to be exhaustive and always have an opinion, less is often more (especially professionally).
 
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Hello Matt, sorry for the delay. In all honesty, I'm not entirely sure what I think.

On the positive side, social media can be great for sharing photo albums and experiences. The other day I joined a group and got a lot of "likes" with my first post. You can really "find your own people" on there - it's not an ego thing; it's about connecting with like-minded individuals.

On the negative side, it's never been a good place for a debate. Regarding conspiracy theories; unfortunately, some of them are true. That said, I'd agree it's a negative thing to keep seeing them. I say "Be aware, but don't dwell on it".

On a more neutral side, we're just so divided now. We've been told so many lies, we no longer have an agreement on a shared reality... That is not our fault. People have been through so much trauma, I find most would rather just have peace over anything else. I'd agree it's very hard to have a discussion nowadays, but I don't think that's particularly different on social media, on forums or in real life. I always say you can have a polite discussion about anything - the key is courtesy and manners.

Overall, I am beginning to see the negative side of social media a bit more than I used to, but I still don't think it's particularly worse than elsewhere on the internet or in society at large. Of course, you do get trolls on there, but you just have to block or ignore them. What's needed on social media is what's needed everywhere else - more kindness, compassion and understanding. When we begin to put ourselves in others' shoes and care about everyone's welfare, perhaps we can finally advance as a society.
 
I've pretty much switched off from social media, I deleted (not just signed out, but deleted) my Reddit account, signed off Twitter (with Musk I may delete too) and sign into my Facebook perhaps twice a year max. I'm simply done with it.

Nostalgia can be dangerous territory but I do genuinely feel that "back in the day" it was a lot better, back when Facebook was about sharing photos with friends, when Twitter was still fairly niche and before YouTube's algorithm went full whack on engagement bait (usually rage bait).

I'm now finding myself wasting time on YouTube shorts which I know is bad for my attention span, and I fear will negatively affect people (especially young people) in ways we can't yet imagine.

On the subject of young people, I went through hell in School and this was before social media. I honestly cannot fathom what kids today have to live with as effectively they're coerced through peer pressure to put their whole lives on social media, even if they abstain someone else will be nasty and do it for them, often making fun of them. It must be horrible. Our (Millennial) generation had magazines pushing unattainable lifestyles and body images, younger generations have influencers and social media simply amplifying this.

You also mentioned how the Internet has divided us, it has. There's so much unchecked and downright false information out there that people are being lead to believe some absolutely insane and often vile nonsense, which is driving an awful, hateful rhetoric that's literally tearing us apart.

Honestly, I believe Social Media has had a much larger negative impact than it has positive. Forums are the way to go.

I honestly, truly want social media to die, and that's just not happening.
 
I think it is completely a nuanced thing. It has made communication and being connected easier than ever, but equally it is made bullying and harassment easier than ever too!

One angle I would like to add to this topic is social media and dating. I feel apps like Tinder and Bumble have completely changed how we meet our partners and romantic interests. This is such a big aspect of society that gets overlooked I feel. The times of meeting at a bar or in public is now over, a bit majority now meet their partners in Tinder. I know half of my friends met their partners on tinder, I met mine on that app! And in ways I feel really grateful there is an app that can connect you to people you would of never met or spoken to in public, it opens up the options and is exciting.

Social Media has made dating a whole different game to how it used to be, sometimes at a detriment. It's very easy to swipe away when you see a slight flaw in someone on Tinder, stuff you would of not cared about in person. Equally in the gay community it has helped being able to connect with other gay people nearby, without needing to awkwardly ask about their sexuality.

For everyone as well I think it shortcuts the awkward "do you find me attractive"? As if they have swiped you, they probably are at least interested.

I could write more but this is just a quick write up. I wonder if more dating apps come popular and if traditional methods ever come back?
 
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