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Shock Horror-An On Time Report-Blackpool


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At the weekend (yes this weekend, not two months ago), I went Blackpool for the second time this year, feel like Blackpool is turning into a bus, don't go for years then go twice in just a few months! I will have photos uploaded in the photo section some time.

Arrived nice and early, and after the confusion of picking up wristbands (really need to sort this out, Blackpool), we headed through the entrance, which for reasons unknown, looks like it was rejected from Ug Land for being "too ****", and headed to our first ride...

Ice Blast! When I forst rode it, I thought it was alright, but not that good. After riding a real tower ride at Flamingo Land, I can now say this is pretty poor in comparison, but atleast they have ORPs on this. After the slightly disapointing start, we walked the short distance to Valhalla, and the theme of being let down continued...

Valhalla is an amazing ride, I would deffend it to the end of the Earth, but boy, did it let me down. Everything was broken on it. The steam room was empty apart from a pathetic trickle of water at the end. Then on the backwards drop the camera has moved to a new section, just before the last lift, I think it is in the room where things nearly hit you. The water tunnel was broken and so where the jets that shoot water up after the tunnel and at the very end. Also, only one of the explosions actually took place in the last room. It was not all bad, though, the cold room was colder than last time, smoke was coming out of the wolf, and so was water, and the viking that turns into a skull and back could be understood. It was very loud, as was the theme music, unlike last time. Also, a demon head pups up before the steam room, in the room that looks like it belongs in the ghost train because it's crap.
Still, even with the problems, it was an amazing ride and I still got trully soaked.

We decided to ride it again later to see if anything was repaired and headed to Grand National. I sat very back without seat belt and with bar as high as possible, and although it was running poorly, the airtime (and resutant pain) was amazing, well worth the agony. I sat on the other side after loosing on the other side twice, but still lost. Never won on Nash yet!

Next we headed to Wild Mouse for some sideways action! I find Wild Mouse butter smooth, and the only really violent turn is the second last one. The airtime if you sit alone is amazing! And yes, I did touch the track!

The one coaster I missed last time, the imaginatively named Rollercoaster is now open due to Dipper's crash, and although I was back car, I was disapointed. It was quite smooth, but not that smooth, and there was very little airtime, just very slight floater on the return run. Probably wpuld have enjoyed it more if the lap bar hadn't kept coming down on me. 5/10

I thought it was about time we did PMBO, and PMBO we did, at the back. The drop was better than at the front, but still not amazing, and as usual, it was an odd experience. To me, PMBO is what a coaster should be, in theory, but sadly they managed to ruin it. I don't really like a perfect ride, and PMBO is far from perfect, but somehow it still doesn't quite manage it. A 'proper' coaster isn't perfectly banked, maybe has straight track, and doesn't take itself too seriously like B&M does; it is not designed to be anything in particular, not air time machine, not insane twister or back cruching vertical G machine. It i ssimply a coaster, and I like that. It has something special about it, for sure, but still, it's not quite good enough.

While we were in the area, we headed to Infusion and endured a massive queue, but eventualy got on the back row. I much prefered the front row, which is funny because I found Kumali, the newer stock SLC design better at the back. I enjoyed it, was a bit rough, but not as bad as it is made out. Restraints could be better and the rather phallic hand grips are just wierd. But then again there are worse restraints out there.

By now we were starving, so headed to one of the food stands and got some 'Infusion Fries'. Yes, they are normal chips with a catchy name and therefore a higher price. We got them in a bucket and spade. It's 10p more expensive than a normal portion but they don't come in a bucket! Never thought I'd see the day I could walk up to someone and shout "you've got a greasy bucket!" without getting a great big back-hander!

Anyone mention bad restraints? Because now was time for Irn Bru Revolution, or as I know it, Arrow's finest hour. Like last time, I sat front row, and like last time, the airtime was amazing, Nash quality airtime, especially going backwards before the loop. The possitive Gs ae fantastic also. How they managed to make a ride like this that good is beyond me, especialy concidering how old it is. Must be witchcraft.

As I said before, we returned to Valhalla to see if they had anything working. The good news was they had! The bad news was not all of it was fixed. The steam was mostly working now, but the water tunnel, water jets and explosions were still not working, the viking at the start was out of sinc. The cold room was even colder, which was good. Even wetter than the morning ride.

Steeplechase was next, and again one side was broken, ths time red, but after a break down, red was working and yellow was broke like last time. What is going on? I won, keeping my record at 100%! Not mch to say about this, nothing special, but a very fun ride.

Bling was open this time, and was quite fun, better than I thought it would be seeing it's cycle. It looked average, but was actualy quite good, but my row only inverted once, near the end. 7/10

Running out of time now, we got on the only big ride left, Avalanche. Sitting at the back and alone, it was quite joul-wobbling, but fun, a pop of airtime between the helixes at the end, and faster than it looks.

Sadly, nenver got on PMBO at night as we had to leave a little early. Will do next time, though, should be epic at night, it certainly looks great at night, all lit up and imposing. I could go on for ages about how visualy impressive it is, but I wont.

Blackpool is a confusing place. On one hand I love the over-grown fun fair atmosphere and appearance it has, but it looks incredibly run down and cheap. It has some great rides, but feels like it isn't arsed about them. I really don't know about this place. The enthusiast in me wants to hate it, but I just can't.

It was a long day, but it was a good one. Look out for the photos coming soon. Possibly.