Yorkshire Tripper VI Trip reports.
- Thread starter furie
- Start date
Darren at least I'm not the only one that does not rate the ultimate that high. Been interesting reading your views after your first visit to the parks.
Great reports so far, it's been good reading them seeing I was not even there. They have been easy to follow just like 6 years ago when I first started to follow cf.
Great reports so far, it's been good reading them seeing I was not even there. They have been easy to follow just like 6 years ago when I first started to follow cf.
MouseAT
Hyper Poster
Well, that was a mixed weekend. Lightwater Valley was amazing as always, with a great group and a nice chilled out atmosphere. There's plenty of fun stuff at that park, even if they desperately need another decent coaster in their line up, and their Top Scan was absolutely insane this time around. Great times.
Flamingo Land on the other hand was depressing. There is no way in hell I'm going back there until they add multiple new credz or something really significant, and there's no way I'm going again in peak season. I'm sorry if I seemed a bit anti-social in the queue for Kumali, but after faffing for ages trying to get some decent lunch before dying of old age I really couldn't be arsed with anything. Quite frankly I would have been quite happy grabbing the Twistosaurus cred and then sodding off home. Thanks to everyone for keeping me sane that afternoon.
I'm currently working on a Live video, so expect that to materialise at some point in the next few days.
Flamingo Land on the other hand was depressing. There is no way in hell I'm going back there until they add multiple new credz or something really significant, and there's no way I'm going again in peak season. I'm sorry if I seemed a bit anti-social in the queue for Kumali, but after faffing for ages trying to get some decent lunch before dying of old age I really couldn't be arsed with anything. Quite frankly I would have been quite happy grabbing the Twistosaurus cred and then sodding off home. Thanks to everyone for keeping me sane that afternoon.
I'm currently working on a Live video, so expect that to materialise at some point in the next few days.
<MouseRage> **** **** **** **** **** **** **** **** **** **** **** **** **** **** **** **** **** **** **** **** **** **** **** **** **** **** **** **** **** **** **** **** **** </MouseRage>Ian said:
I think what got me about Flamingo Land was the amount of litter EVERYWHERE.
All over the pathways, in all the queue lines, in all the water, it was just all filled with discarded bottles, crisp and sweet packets, batteries (I mean, what the hell!) and all other sorts of ****. And then the dust storm that was kicking up from the old Corkscrew site looked like a scene at the end of an apocalypse movie or something.
Utterly vile place.
Mumbo Jumbo was good though; certainly better than the **** at Indiana Beach!
All over the pathways, in all the queue lines, in all the water, it was just all filled with discarded bottles, crisp and sweet packets, batteries (I mean, what the hell!) and all other sorts of ****. And then the dust storm that was kicking up from the old Corkscrew site looked like a scene at the end of an apocalypse movie or something.
Utterly vile place.
Mumbo Jumbo was good though; certainly better than the **** at Indiana Beach!
CookieCoasters
Giga Poster
^ what's the difference?
It's disappointing to hear Flamingo Land's operations are still half-arsed. I've gone from being a fanboy of the park to having no desire whatsoever to visit it, despite it being an hour away from home.
Even when I was a fanboy I only ever visited during off-peak times as I visited once in the holidays, queued 90 minutes for Kumali, watched the bird show and **** off home. Atmosphere was horrendous.
Lightwater Valley never fails to disappoint on visits despite the distinct lack of attractions in comparison to Flamingo Land - just goes to show it's not all about quantity and my 2nd theme park visit of the year is being specifically reserved for Frightwater Valley.
Gutted I couldn't make it. If I get this new job I'll be looking at Ghosterforce due to the increased salary so we'll see.
Even when I was a fanboy I only ever visited during off-peak times as I visited once in the holidays, queued 90 minutes for Kumali, watched the bird show and **** off home. Atmosphere was horrendous.
Lightwater Valley never fails to disappoint on visits despite the distinct lack of attractions in comparison to Flamingo Land - just goes to show it's not all about quantity and my 2nd theme park visit of the year is being specifically reserved for Frightwater Valley.
Gutted I couldn't make it. If I get this new job I'll be looking at Ghosterforce due to the increased salary so we'll see.
If I'm honest, I though the banter was lacking on both days. Due to the motorcyclist crash on Saturday and subsequent lack of sleep, I wasn't exactly in top form on Sunday, but I think the FL day generated the most laughs. The quiz made people giggle and so did the chinese whispers. The random mongs in the Mumbo Jumbo queue line were funny; especially the Bogey Man who looked like an ape. I guessed we just resigned ourselves to a poor day at FL and made the best of it. When I next hold a Live at FL, it won't be in the school holidays and it'll be after they get a few more creds. I don't see the need to go back year on year.
LWV only gets revisist because it's unpretentious and there's enough there for a entertaining day out. The Angry Birds play area looked good, not my sort of thing but I felt it was tucked away off to the site of the main entrance building. I'll be going back up for Frightwater on 2nd November cus I want to ride Ultimate in the dark.
LWV only gets revisist because it's unpretentious and there's enough there for a entertaining day out. The Angry Birds play area looked good, not my sort of thing but I felt it was tucked away off to the site of the main entrance building. I'll be going back up for Frightwater on 2nd November cus I want to ride Ultimate in the dark.
Mushroom
Goon of the Year
Ian said:
'fraid to burst your bubble Ian, Ultimate does not run at night time. Closes at dusk. Will get the official word why soon. Edit: Apparently it is to do with the farm next door & deers
Also we weren't the only ones to have a bad day at Flamingo, been reading a lot of the reports and general public are having a **** time.
http://www.tripadvisor.co.uk/Attraction ... gland.html
This...
This...
And this...
Highlights (excluding those above)
-The quiz; brilliantly put together by Ian. The word search finding all the added extras was superb. I loved getting mine covered in vinegar from the awful fish and chips place.
- Lightwater Valley; awesome day. I like the park anyway, but it was really chilled and pleasant. Surprise ERT is always a bonus, but it's such a great park to just mooch around.
- Raptor attack; it almost lived up to my expectations.
- The most exciting game in the WOOOOORRRRRLLLLLLDDDD!
- Gooning with Darren B; such a goon.
- Talking complete crap with Sue, Mike, Fraser, and Andy; fullof$hit.
- Sue's special goon friend; such a goon.
- Jordan's special mong; such a mong.
- The Ultimate not hurting too much; still only one go though
- Simultaneous moans on the Black Pearl; 'held in by my crotch "Euuuuugggggghhhh" and the right way again'.
- Eagle's Claw; nauseating but superb fun.
- Angry Birds; not visiting it.
- Flamingoland Zoo; shockingly good.
- Actually, Flamingoland; with all the scutters gone, no queues and not going on rides, it's surprisingly nice.
Lowlights
- The queue for Treetops coaster; what a complete burden.
- Maxi-Minor_Furie needing the toilet as we reached the front of the queue for said Treetops coaster; what a complete burden.
- Free fish and chips; still too expensive.
- Hero giving me an itchy nose I couldn't scratch, then cramp I couldn't exercise out; utter tosh.
- Mumbo Jumbo bruising my shoulders; utter tosh.
- Flamingoland; queues, concrete, queues, concrete, queues then mediocrity.
I imagine more highs and lows if people make comments and stuff :lol:
The problem for me is hang time. I'm heavy (fat bastard syndrome, it's not muscle, it's fat), so hanging with all my weight on my shoulders is a big problem. With the S&S restraints, it's even worse. Why does the lap bar not actually hold you in at all? Every time it inverted in any way shape or form, all my weight was on the shoulder restraints. They're solid, so 16 stone on two hard points is very less than pleasant. It did leave bruises on both my shoulder blades
The first drop, and the kind of airtime hill thing though were actually really good. I think our ride consisted of (in tandem on our train):
"Lift hill's quite fast. Brace for drop. Oh, okay. ARgh! Ouch. Look out. No. WTF? Mother **** . Dammit, no, no, no ARRRRGGHGHHHHH! Wee, that was fun. Argh, Ouch. Erk. Phew, it's over."
To clarify now I'm at a keyboard Though it probably helps if you've ever had a water infections
The first lift hill is that feeling you need a wee. You know that it may be unpleasant, but there's always the chance that this time, just now, the infection will be clear and you'll be fine.
The first drop is the excitement of getting your tackle out/dropping knickers and positioning yourself ready for the oncoming waterfall.
It doesn't happen. So you stand/sit there for several minutes, bits in hand (I assume women don't hold their bits, so you do whatever you do) bored and knowing that this may end in nothing. This is the first section after the first lift hill.
Then, the pressure builds and you know the dam will burst. You're on the second lift hill and anticipation is high. But NO! You have that long slow crawl around the top as you can feel the urine in it's desire to escape, but the body just isn't willing.
Second drop and the flood gates open. OMG! You're pissing a brick. For what seems like hours, you're in a huge and massive mix of emotions as the relief of finally being able to extract the urine is overshadowed by the intense pain of a thousand pieces of glass leaving your body through a small, sensitive hole. Again and again you have to deal with the onslaught of wave after wave of metaphorical boiling water in the curves and dips as the train crashes through the course.
Then suddenly it's all over. It feels like a lifetime has passed (and half a house). The last near pain free dribble drops into your pants as you approach the final lift to the station and zip yourself up.
Once a day is surely enough for anyone?
It's the kind of girl who would let you play here vadge as though it was an impromptu ocarina or other vaguely rude shaped wind instrument.
Karen said:Had a great time at Lightwater especially watching Mushroom and IAN bungy jumping
This...
Lain said:
And this...
caffeine_demon said:
Highlights (excluding those above)
-The quiz; brilliantly put together by Ian. The word search finding all the added extras was superb. I loved getting mine covered in vinegar from the awful fish and chips place.
- Lightwater Valley; awesome day. I like the park anyway, but it was really chilled and pleasant. Surprise ERT is always a bonus, but it's such a great park to just mooch around.
- Raptor attack; it almost lived up to my expectations.
- The most exciting game in the WOOOOORRRRRLLLLLLDDDD!
- Gooning with Darren B; such a goon.
- Talking complete crap with Sue, Mike, Fraser, and Andy; fullof$hit.
- Sue's special goon friend; such a goon.
- Jordan's special mong; such a mong.
- The Ultimate not hurting too much; still only one go though
- Simultaneous moans on the Black Pearl; 'held in by my crotch "Euuuuugggggghhhh" and the right way again'.
- Eagle's Claw; nauseating but superb fun.
- Angry Birds; not visiting it.
- Flamingoland Zoo; shockingly good.
- Actually, Flamingoland; with all the scutters gone, no queues and not going on rides, it's surprisingly nice.
Lowlights
- The queue for Treetops coaster; what a complete burden.
- Maxi-Minor_Furie needing the toilet as we reached the front of the queue for said Treetops coaster; what a complete burden.
- Free fish and chips; still too expensive.
- Hero giving me an itchy nose I couldn't scratch, then cramp I couldn't exercise out; utter tosh.
- Mumbo Jumbo bruising my shoulders; utter tosh.
- Flamingoland; queues, concrete, queues, concrete, queues then mediocrity.
I imagine more highs and lows if people make comments and stuff :lol:
CookieCoasters said:How is Mumbo jumble vile? It is so awesome
The problem for me is hang time. I'm heavy (fat bastard syndrome, it's not muscle, it's fat), so hanging with all my weight on my shoulders is a big problem. With the S&S restraints, it's even worse. Why does the lap bar not actually hold you in at all? Every time it inverted in any way shape or form, all my weight was on the shoulder restraints. They're solid, so 16 stone on two hard points is very less than pleasant. It did leave bruises on both my shoulder blades
The first drop, and the kind of airtime hill thing though were actually really good. I think our ride consisted of (in tandem on our train):
"Lift hill's quite fast. Brace for drop. Oh, okay. ARgh! Ouch. Look out. No. WTF? Mother **** . Dammit, no, no, no ARRRRGGHGHHHHH! Wee, that was fun. Argh, Ouch. Erk. Phew, it's over."
furie said:
To clarify now I'm at a keyboard
Though it probably helps if you've ever had a water infections The first lift hill is that feeling you need a wee. You know that it may be unpleasant, but there's always the chance that this time, just now, the infection will be clear and you'll be fine.
The first drop is the excitement of getting your tackle out/dropping knickers and positioning yourself ready for the oncoming waterfall.
It doesn't happen. So you stand/sit there for several minutes, bits in hand (I assume women don't hold their bits, so you do whatever you do) bored and knowing that this may end in nothing. This is the first section after the first lift hill.
Then, the pressure builds and you know the dam will burst. You're on the second lift hill and anticipation is high. But NO! You have that long slow crawl around the top as you can feel the urine in it's desire to escape, but the body just isn't willing.
Second drop and the flood gates open. OMG! You're pissing a brick. For what seems like hours, you're in a huge and massive mix of emotions as the relief of finally being able to extract the urine is overshadowed by the intense pain of a thousand pieces of glass leaving your body through a small, sensitive hole. Again and again you have to deal with the onslaught of wave after wave of metaphorical boiling water in the curves and dips as the train crashes through the course.
Then suddenly it's all over. It feels like a lifetime has passed (and half a house). The last near pain free dribble drops into your pants as you approach the final lift to the station and zip yourself up.
Once a day is surely enough for anyone?
furie said:and we know what a strumpet is now
It's the kind of girl who would let you play here vadge as though it was an impromptu ocarina or other vaguely rude shaped wind instrument.
MouseAT
Hyper Poster
furie said:
Exactly this. It's got fun rides and it's ideal for a nice chilled out, stress free day.furie said:
It was even more entertaining from off ride. The moment the ride started to invert, you could just hear everyone moan "Euuuuugggggghhhh" in unison.furie said:
I must have a stronger stomach than most then. Whilst I doubt I'd be able to do more than two rides in quick succession, I found the ride cycle to be amazing, and I find it to be a nice length. Long enough to be enjoyable, not so long that I start feeling ill.furie said:
I do love a good afterburner.
Anyway, seeing as the video isn't ready yet, here are a few more photos to tide everyone over:
caffeine_demon
Strata Poster
furie said:CookieCoasters said:How is Mumbo jumble vile? It is so awesome
The problem for me is hang time. I'm heavy (fat bastard syndrome, it's not muscle, it's fat), so hanging with all my weight on my shoulders is a big problem. (*SNIP*)
for me, I found it had a fair few negative points, but not too many positive ones.
first downside - those restraints - the shoulder pads are just irritatingly uncomfortable, and you get a bit of a booshing from some of the transitions
Neutral bit - the first drop ain't bad - not good, but not bad!
plusside - I don't actually mind that hangtime and slow roll before the dive loop.
2nd downside - there's something ghastly about the downwards roll, which I can't quite put my finger on
and the real deal breaker for me is the final turnaround - a real nasty bump on both the way in and out!
MouseAT
Hyper Poster
Video is up.
There is swearing at the end, so consider yourselves warned if you're at work or any other public environment where that wouldn't be appropriate.
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LN2_JHQnZHQ[/youtube]
Unfortunately, it's not available on mobile devices. YouTube have extended their mobile device blocking to the desktop version of the site now. Maybe it's time I started looking at new video hosts for this stuff.
Enjoy!
There is swearing at the end, so consider yourselves warned if you're at work or any other public environment where that wouldn't be appropriate.
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LN2_JHQnZHQ[/youtube]
Unfortunately, it's not available on mobile devices. YouTube have extended their mobile device blocking to the desktop version of the site now. Maybe it's time I started looking at new video hosts for this stuff.
Enjoy!
EnigmaHyena
Hyper Poster
Despite the awful queues over both days and turd service yet again from Flamingoland staff it was actually a great, laid back Live. I'd done both parks before so I didn't really care about how many rides we got on - I go to hang out with you bunch of mongs anyway.
I did get lots of photos but as Furie knows I have the turd WindowsPhone which is selfish and doesn't like to share it's stored images with the Internet. I brought that burden upon myself really. Most of you have my Facebook so I'll put them up there at some point
Was just great seeing everyone again and acting like total grown-ups.
Turns out that despite absolutely failing at getting into the coaster car and having an annoying combination of an itchy shoulder and my hoodie zip digging in my neck Hero was a pretty decent ride! Very odd sensation but didn't find it to be be vile like people made it out to be.
Haha, Black Pearl probably was one of the main highlights...I think it was Jordan who said that our unified "OOUUAARRGGH" was the ride's way of getting pirate sound effects from everyone and BAM! There's your theming!
Another highlight was Sue emitting her burden aura attracting a complete goon in the 90 minute Mumbo Jumbo queue. Her face of despair and pleading eyes as this randomer spewed an endless monologue highlighting his favourite rides and how Blackpool and FL have the best rides in the world was a spectacle to behold. What a legend.
Also great to meet Simon/Symaxious at Lightwater again...although he loses points for not remembering my name, hence why I refused to shake his hand and protested "You don't get a handshake, I already know who you are!". Big thanks to him and Ian for sorting out ERT on t'Ultimate...even if me and Sue were stuck on back row getting beaten to a pulp.
Thanks to everyone for making it an amazing weekend, and thanks to Sue for maintaining your burdensome status by getting us lost and making us late for both days, among other things (lol seriously you were ace, thanks for everything). Best last minute trip ever! "Most exciting Live in the wooooorrrlldd".
Sent from my awful WindowsPhone(boo!) using it's broken version of Tapatalk
I did get lots of photos but as Furie knows I have the turd WindowsPhone which is selfish and doesn't like to share it's stored images with the Internet. I brought that burden upon myself really. Most of you have my Facebook so I'll put them up there at some point
Was just great seeing everyone again and acting like total grown-ups.
Turns out that despite absolutely failing at getting into the coaster car and having an annoying combination of an itchy shoulder and my hoodie zip digging in my neck Hero was a pretty decent ride! Very odd sensation but didn't find it to be be vile like people made it out to be.
Haha, Black Pearl probably was one of the main highlights...I think it was Jordan who said that our unified "OOUUAARRGGH" was the ride's way of getting pirate sound effects from everyone and BAM! There's your theming!
Another highlight was Sue emitting her burden aura attracting a complete goon in the 90 minute Mumbo Jumbo queue. Her face of despair and pleading eyes as this randomer spewed an endless monologue highlighting his favourite rides and how Blackpool and FL have the best rides in the world was a spectacle to behold. What a legend.
Also great to meet Simon/Symaxious at Lightwater again...although he loses points for not remembering my name, hence why I refused to shake his hand and protested "You don't get a handshake, I already know who you are!". Big thanks to him and Ian for sorting out ERT on t'Ultimate...even if me and Sue were stuck on back row getting beaten to a pulp.
Thanks to everyone for making it an amazing weekend, and thanks to Sue for maintaining your burdensome status by getting us lost and making us late for both days, among other things (lol seriously you were ace, thanks for everything). Best last minute trip ever! "Most exciting Live in the wooooorrrlldd".
Sent from my awful WindowsPhone(boo!) using it's broken version of Tapatalk
MouseAT said:
How rude!!!
I was just about to ask people for their vote on what music I should use. Option one was "Somethnig modern and anthemy", option 2 was "Something [not so subtly] poignant and pointed".
You've covered both bases there already...
AND!!!
You've got all the same shots as me, only better!
AND!!!
It's better timed.
So rude doing it all better than I could :lol:
Enigma Shadow said:
Wow!!! OMG!!! The most amazing phone in the WOOOOORRRRRRRLLLD!
caffeine_demon
Strata Poster
Darren B said:
I need to get my mind out of the gutter!! :drinking:
ciallkennett
Strata Poster
That quiz looked fab, been splitting my sides reading it - great job Ian!
I'm gutted I missed this live (combined burden's of sorting out uni life and complete and utter lack of money) preventing me from coming
Enjoying the trip reports and glad to hear 'Mingeland is still very eughhhhhhhhhhh since my last (and only visit) back with CF in '09. Keep 'em coming!
Hero LOOKS nice, but I doubt it rides well if it's anything like the Volares I've done before...
I'm gutted I missed this live (combined burden's of sorting out uni life and complete and utter lack of money) preventing me from coming
Enjoying the trip reports and glad to hear 'Mingeland is still very eughhhhhhhhhhh since my last (and only visit) back with CF in '09. Keep 'em coming!
Hero LOOKS nice, but I doubt it rides well if it's anything like the Volares I've done before...
When I visited Flamingo Land during the 2008 Live, I really enjoyed the park.
Everything was very clean and presentable, the ERT on Kumali was excellent and I thought the park had a really positive vibe going for it.
During this Live, there was litter everywhere, the employees were ponderous at best, everything looked tacky and half-arsed and the atmosphere felt abysmal.
What the hell happened? :?
Everything was very clean and presentable, the ERT on Kumali was excellent and I thought the park had a really positive vibe going for it.
During this Live, there was litter everywhere, the employees were ponderous at best, everything looked tacky and half-arsed and the atmosphere felt abysmal.
What the hell happened? :?
MouseAT
Hyper Poster
2009 was much the same. An all around fun day, with the impression that the park was going to be one to watch in the years to come.Mike said:
Management clearly stopped giving a ****. Things were terrible in 2011, but thinking back to 2010 I think that's probably when the rot started to set in.Mike said:
Flamingo Land is one of the most depressing parks to be stuck in when it's a busy weekend in the summer holidays. This is half the reason I was so annoyed at Vadge for not getting her ass in gear.
The sad thing is, crowds aside the staff and operations are actually an improvement on our last visit in 2011. Sure the employees were "ponderous" this time around, but at least they weren't downright rude, and they were slightly more efficient at getting people through Kumali (which is damning with faint praise). Unfortunately, the queues were also a hell of a lot longer this time around, and the park just doesn't have it's **** together enough to handle those sorts of crowds.
Right now, I don't want to go back to the park, even on a quiet day. Right now I hate the place even more than I did after the 2011 Live. As I said earlier, after lunch I was ready to just get the remaining Twistosaurus cred and then go home. I had no enthusiasm left. I resent paying them to spend the day feeling like I'm an inconvenience to them. Operations and throughput are clearly not even on management's radar. It's clearly all about cost cutting, and doing the bare minimum possible. That's what happened.